MAINTENANCE: in the confines of a D/s relationship, the practice of a dominant making sure that certain protocols and rituals are adhered to in order to maintain the relationship dynamic. It also refers to the practice of a dominant spanking or giving corporal punishment to a submissive without merit of any wrongdoing on the part of the submissive and/or to cover any infraction that might have been missed during a particular time. The act is meant as a reminder of the relationship, served as maintenance to the mental well-being of the participants and their relationship. MANACLES: a generic term for any metal cuff joined by a metal chain. A device for confining the hands, usually referring to a set of two rings that are joined together, or to a structure with a metal chain. MARTINET: also known as a fouet d'enfant; a short, scourge-like whip consisting of a wooden handle of about ten inches and about ten lashes of equal or shorter length. The lashes are usually made of leather, but sometimes soap-stiffened cords are used instead. It was the traditional implement for corporal punishment in France, usually for flogging children. In England, for many years the term martinet was used as the title of the person administering the corporal punishment rather than to describe the whip itself. MASKING BELT: a thick, heavy leather belt, sometimes a weight-lifting belt, placed on a standing submissive for the purpose of protecting the kidneys or other vital organs during a heavy flogging or caning. While standing or leaning against flagellation furniture, sometimes a submissive will flinch or tighten up at the whisking sound of an approaching cane or flogger. This slight movement can shift the intended target greatly. There is no shame for even the most skilled dominant to use a masking belt for added safety. MASOCHISM: the tendency to derive pleasure and sexual gratification from one's own pain or humiliation; the enjoyment of what appears to be painful. Not to be confused with sadism, which is to derive the same pleasure from administering pain or humiliation to another. The context of the pain is important to the masochist, usually connected in some way to a sexual experience or simply to the fantasy of being abused or dominated. The term masochism was coined in 1886 by psychiatrist Richard Freiherr von Krafft-Ebing. He named the term after the writer Leopold von Sacher-Masoch, an active submissive, who was known for his writings, in particular "Venus in Furs", a story about his exploits as a slave with his mistress. See related SADOMASOCHISM. MASOCHIST: one who engages in masochism. MASTER: a male dominant, usually in a total power exchange relationship with a submissive. The title of the person assuming the role of owner in slave play. Loosely, any male who takes on the role of dominant in a BDSM activity. A prefix title announcing one's sexual preference for the role of a dominant. The term can also refer to gaining great skill or proficiency as a dom in the context of mastery. MASTER/SLAVE RELATIONSHIP (M/s): a BDSM relationship in which one person assumes the role of master while the other assumes the role of slave. Also refers to a total power exchange relationship. MEDICAL PLAY: a certain type of role-play in which participants play act that they are in a medical care setting, taking on the role of either a medical professional or a patient, sometimes involving costumes and medical equipment. The term also refers to BDSM play involving the use of medical equipment, yet not necessarily involving actual role-play. Some of the more common medical implements used in BDSM are Wartenberg wheels, buck hammers, breast clamps, speculums, catheters, mouth gags, PES devices, tens units, straitjackets, urethral sounds, enemas, and assorted needles. MENTOR: one who teaches another in matters of BDSM. Usually, an experienced dominant helping a newbie dominant learn the aspects of BDSM, focusing on safety. MESSALINA COMPLEX: a term for nymphomania, or someone with a strong, promiscuous sexual appetite. MICRO BRANDING: see DEVIL'S FIRE. MILITARY PLAY: a form of role-play involving military attire, protocols, and hierarchical structure. A BDSM role-play power exchange between a person taking on the role of a superior rank and that of a person taking on the role of a lesser rank or having lesser worth. MILKING or PROSTATE MILKING or PROSTATE MASSAGE: the practice of inducing orgasm in a male repeatedly until he is no longer able to produce ejaculate. See related DRY HEAVES. Stimulating a male's prostate by way of the anus with either a finger or dildo for a long enough time to produce ejaculation without orgasm. It is also a term for a male orgasm that has been intensified by stimulation of the prostate. The prostate is an essential component in a male orgasm. Sometimes, the stimulation of the man's prostate makes it impossible for him to prolong orgasm or keep an erection. See related PUPPETEERING. MISTRESS: a female dominant, usually in a total power exchange relationship with a submissive. The female equivalent of master. Loosely, any female who takes on the role of dominant in a BDSM activity. A prefix title announcing one's sexual preference for the role of dominant. Also refers to a pro-domme. In the vanilla world, the term mistress can sometimes refer to a woman having an extramarital sexual relationship with a married man. MOMMY: a female dominant with mother- or mommy-like qualities. A mommy is considered stern yet is also nurturing and loving. The term mommy can, but does not always, refer to a title or role taken in age play. See related AGE PLAY. MONKEY FIST FLOGGER: a specific type of flogger, usually about three to four lashes made of rope with heavy monkey fist knots at the ends. A monkey fist is a type of knot that is tied in such a way as to make a heavy ball, used to throw lines of rope over poles for rigging. A monkey fist flogger can be dangerous if vigorously used, as the tips of the flogger are heavy enough to cause severe bruising or internal bleeding. MONOGLOVE: a restraint that has a long sleeve in which both arms and hands are bound with adjustable straps and/or laces. Similar to, and sometimes referred to, as an armbinder. See related ARMBINDER. MONOGAMY: the practice or state of being married to one person at a time: the practice or state of having only one sexual relationship with only one partner. The opposite of polyamory. See related contrast POLYAMORY. MOUTH BIT: any style of gag that has a bit attached, meant to be placed between the teeth and secured with a buckle or clasp. Mouth bits often resemble a horse bit and are often used in pony play. MOUTH GAG: any of the many different types of dental instruments designed to keep the mouth open for medical procedures. These items are sometimes used in BDSM and are often found for sale in BDSM adult toy stores. MUMMIFICATION: a type of bondage in which a person is immobilized by being wrapped tightly with a material such as fabric, latex, tape, common kitchen cling wrap or packing stretch wrap. MUNCH: a gathering (usually a dinner party at a house or a public restaurant) of people who are interested in BDSM for the purpose of meeting like-minded people to freely discuss BDSM topics. Unlike a play party, a munch seldom includes overt BDSM activities, as it is meant to be a casual affair in a low-pressure atmosphere. MUZZLE GAG: a gag with a flat panel on the front that goes directly over the wearer's mouth and is secured by straps. Muzzle gags are often attached to a head harness. ADVERTISEMENTS: ~ |