S & M: see SADOMASOCHISM.  S-TYPE: refers to a person who takes on the role of submissive. A submissive type of person. The opposite of a D-type (dominant type) person. A way in which to describe a person's chosen role in BDSM activities without assigning them a title. See SUBMISSIVE. SADISM: the tendency to derive pleasure and sexual gratification from inflicting pain, torment, suffering or humiliation on others. Not to be confused with masochism which is to derive the same pleasure from receiving pain and/or humiliation. It should be noted that in the BDSM world, sadism is frowned upon when it is not matched with masochism. In other words, deriving pleasure from inflicting pain should only come from the knowledge that the receiver of such pain is also drawing pleasure from the same experience. See related SADOMASOCHISM. SADIST: one who engages in Sadism. SADIST STICK: see EVIL STICK or CATTLE PROD. SADOMASOCHISM or S & M or S/M: a psychological tendency or sexual practice characterized by both sadism and masochism; a blanket term for pain play, or anything involving BDSM. The terms sadism, masochism, and sadomasochism were coined by psychiatrist studying the subject, so named after two authors who wrote on the subject: the Marquis de Sade and Leopold von Sacher-Masoch. See related SADISM and see related MASOCHISM. 
SADOMASOCHIST: a person who engages in sadomasochism. A blanket term for anyone who has an interest in BDSM. The term is also sometimes used to describe a person who approaches BDSM as an art form or adds spiritualistic qualities to BDSM. A person who holds the philosophy that certain acts of dominance, such as using BDSM as a therapeutic tool whilst reaching a certain level of sexual euphoria, can be considered art. Much as some view Japanese shibari bondage as an art form for its ritualistic approach to the journey of restraining a person, along with its aesthetic value, so too do some believe that sadomasochism, in general, can be seen as an art form when taking the same spiritual approach, along with its aesthetic value. In other words, some use the term sadomasochist to describe a BDSM artist. SAFE CALL: an arranged set of circumstances in which a person has a friend call them at a specified time to check up on her/him when meeting someone new or unfamiliar for the purposes of a potential mate or play partner. SAFE, SANE, & CONSENSUAL (SSC): a code of conduct or philosophy that any BDSM act is acceptable and ethical, provided that it is safe, sane, and consensual. There is some controversy over this philosophy, as some view the term safe, as too subjective, and also because people often consensually engage in activities such as edgeplay. See RISK AWARE CONSENSUAL KINK. SAFE SIGN or SAFE SIGNAL: as a safety measure, a predefined sign or gesture that a submissive can use to signal to the dominant to stop or slow play. Similar to a safeword but instead of a spoken code word the submissive gives a physical sign she/he needs to stop BDSM activities. When a submissive is bound for play and/or gagged, a safeword might prove to be difficult to say aloud, whereas a physical symbol might be more prudent. An example of a safe sign could be a submissive holding onto an object during play and then dropping the object to the floor to signal to the dominant to stop all BDSM activities. See also SAFEWORD. SAFE ZONES or SAFE AREAS or TARGET ZONES or STRIKE ZONES: the areas of the body that are fleshy or have layers of muscle, which can be struck safely during flagellation or caning. Areas where bones or vital organs are near the surface are not safe zones. Safe zones should be learned before a person takes a flogger or cane in hand. 
SAFETY KIT: a collection of items that focus on BDSM, kept nearby during a play session for the purpose of supplying quick aid in the event of an emergency. Such items could include: 1). extra handcuff keys, 2). extra lock keys, 3). bolt cutters, 4). EMT scissors, 5). disinfectant, 6). antiseptic, 7). bandages or gauze pads, 8). tape, 9). smelling salts, 10). topical analgesic cream, 11). latex gloves, 12). condoms, 13). A pamphlet with CPR instructions, 14). aloe, 15). cell phone. Different activities dictate different safety items. Safety kits should be built according to the pending activity. SAFETY TIE: see BONDAGE SAFETY TIE. SAFEWORD: a predefined code word or series of code words that a submissive may say to clearly communicate an emotional or physical state to the dominant, most often used to immediately cease or pause any BDSM activity. In BDSM, resistance play and forced sex play are often part of a session; hence, in BDSM, the word no does not always mean no. When safewords are put into practice, the submissive has a way to maintain the use of the word no by saying aloud the predetermined safeword. This aids in keeping the act consensual and adds an additional layer of safety. Safewords should be simple words or phrases that are easy to remember. Sometimes play sessions can be so exhilarating and intense that even simple safewords can be forgotten. It remains the responsibility of the dominant to ensure the submissive's safety by being attentive and not relying completely on safewords. Safewords can help with safety, but safewords do not guarantee safety. SAINT ANDREW'S CROSS: see the more common spelling ST. ANDREW'S CROSS. SALTIRE: another name for a St. Andrew's Cross. See ST. ANDREW'S CROSS. SANDWICHING: the sexual practice or act in which a male penetrates another person, usually female, and a third person, a male, or a female with a strap-on, penetrates the male. For example, a man has vaginal or anal sex with one partner while he is being anally penetrated by another, possibly with a strap-on. 
SCARFING: breath-control play, by means of a scarf or necktie. Scarfing is also sometimes used as a title for the act of engaging in erotic asphyxiation. See EROTIC APHYXIATION. 
SCARIFICATION: a form of body modification that involves cutting the flesh of a person, and then treating it in such a way as to leave a permanent scar. See related BODY MODIFICATION. 
SCAT also BROWN SHOWER: any activity involving feces. Note: anilingus is not considered scat play until actual feces is involved as a welcomed part of the activity. SCENE or PLAY SCENE: the time period of a BDSM activity from when two people begin a BDSM activity to the time they stop. The terms play, scene, and session are all used synonymously, both as a non and an adjective. All three are meant to describe the time engaged in BDSM. The term scene is also commonly used to mean the BDSM community as a whole. See related PLAY, SESSION, and BDSM COMMUNITY. SCENE NAME: an alias name one calls him/herself in realms involving BDSM. In many circles it is considered proper etiquette to use scene names rather than real names while in a BDSM environment. Throughout history, those who have had an interest in BDSM activities have had to hide their interest from those who might scorn them for such interests. The common practice of choosing an alias to help conceal a person's identity and interests from vanilla coworkers, children, and family members is still in use today and has become increasingly necessary with postings on the Internet. See related NAME CHANGE. SCISSORING: a sexual position in which female partners interlock their legs, much like a pair of scissors, spreading their legs so that they can rub their genitalia together and stimulate each other's clitoris. The sexual position is a practice called tribadism. See TRIBADISM. 
SCOLD'S BRIDLE: a metal cage type mask, with an integrated metal muzzle gag that is worn on the head and locked into place. The original scold's bridle from the Middle Ages, also known as "the branks," was made of iron and primarily used on women as a form of torture and public humiliation. The gag was frequently studded with spikes so that if the wearer moved her tongue, it inflicted pain and made speech impossible. A Scold is an old English term for a woman who was considered a public nuisance. Wives who were seen as gossips, witches, shrews, and scolds were forced to wear the device in public. Today, in the BDSM realm, Scold's Bridles are often made of leather and have a far less harmful muzzle gag. 
SCOURGE: a specific type of flogger that usually has two to three heavy leather lashes or three lashes made of thick cord with blood knots or barrel knots. 
SELF BONDAGE: the practice of restraining oneself, usually as a part of masturbation. Considered dangerous. Considered very dangerous. SENNET WHIP: a type of single-tail whip consisting of a length of thin rope, knotted on the end, and then coated with wax or liquid rubber. 
SENSATION PLAY or SKIN PLAY or SENSORY PLAY: any play in which the main focus is bringing about physical sensations to a person's body for erotic arousal. Wartenberg wheels, fur floggers, knives, sandpaper, and candles are common devices in sensation play. 
SENSORY DEPRIVATION: any practice intended to deprive a person of normal external stimuli such as sight and sound for the purposes of inciting fear, anxiety, and/or sexual arousal as a part of sensation play. 
SENSUALIST: a person who prides themselves in the enjoyment of giving and receiving tender touch, concentrating on aesthetic, rather than the pain involved in BDSM activities. SERPENT'S KISS: see TAWSE. SERVICE D/s: a type of D/s centered on the act of being in complete service to the dominant, usually involving practical tasks or many diminutive chores. Sometimes refers to a professional submissive who is paid to take the role of a submissive in a BDSM play session. SERVICE TOP: a person who serves a person’s needs by dominating them yet may not necessarily get any direct gratification from being dominant. Sometimes refers to a professional dominant who is paid to dominate and play with a submissive per the submissive's instructions and direction, as in that the submissive directs the session. SESSION or PLAY SESSION: the time period of a BDSM activity from when two people begin a BDSM activity to the time they stop. The terms play, session, and scene are all used synonymously, both as an adjective and a noun. All three are meant to describe the time engaged in BDSM. The term session is also commonly used to mean the time spent with a pro-domme or pro-dom. See related PLAY and SCENE. SEX SLING or SEX SWING: a hammock type seat designed so that a person can recline with legs spread apart, making it convenient for sexual intercourse. See also FISTING SLING. 
SEXSOMNIA or SLEEPSEX: a condition in which a person engages in sexual intercourse or sexual acts while still asleep and not cognitively aware of the action. It is related to sleepwalking or sleep apnea and is sometimes triggered by stress. Sexsomnia is also a term that is sometimes used in some BDSM circles for the act of having sex with a sleeping submissive who gave consent to the activity before falling asleep. See also SOMNOPHILIA PLAY. SEXUAL ASPHYXIATION: see EROTIC ASPHYXIATION. SHACKLES: a pair of metal cuffs connected together by chain, used to fasten the wrists or the ankles together. 
SHIBARI: first known as kinbaku meaning “tight binding”, is a type of bondage originating in Japan, involving extremely elaborate and intricate patterns of rope for the purposes of not only restraining a person, but also for the aesthetics of the bind. Japanese bondage is distinguished by its use of specific forms and appearance regulations. In particular, it is very much about how the rope is applied and specific pressures given to each bind. It is also important to note that shibari takes the view that it is more about the journey or process of being tied up than the destination of being bound. Shibari is considered an art form. 
SHINJU: a type of rope harness that is tied around the breasts. It does not restrict a person's movements but can provide constant stimulation as a person moves. 
SHOE FETISHISM or RETIFISM: a type of sexual expression centered on a fixation on shoes or the wearing of shoes. 
SHREW'S FIDDLE or FIDDLE: a type of restraint originally made of wood, a type of portable pillory, in which the head and wrists can be bound in single file. Its shape is much like that of a violin, from which it gets its name. Historically, the shrew's fiddle (neck violin), also known as a "Halsgeige," was originally used in the medieval time period to punish and torture people for various infractions. It was also used on unruly or quarrelsome women. Sometimes a small bell was attached to the end of the fiddle to let townspeople know that the troublesome woman was nearing. Often a rope or chain was attached to the fiddle so that she could be led around streets by an aggrieved husband in public view. She was then often birched or flogged whilst in the restraint. The shrew's fiddle was intended to shame and embarrass the victim as well as cause discomfort with the positioning of her restrained arms. Some fiddles were constructed as to have two people bound to each other, facing each other, but in such a way that they could not touch each other. There was also a metal version that was commonly used on slaves, with combined shackles that bound the arms and neck in the same fashion as the wood version. Currently metal versions of the shrew's fiddle are the most common replicas sold for BDSM use. 
SIGNAL WHIP: a type of small, single-tail whip, usually about 3 to 4 feet in length, made of leather or nylon. The signal whip has a flexible handle like a snake whip, only a signal whip has no fall before the cracker. The signal whip is braided straight to the cracker. The signal whip was originally used to make a loud crack noise signaling to dog teams (snow sled teams). Without the fall it is much easier to crack, however, for BDSM purposes it is much more difficult to replace the cracker. 
SINGLE COLUMN TIE: see ONE COLUMN TIE and BONDAGE SAFETY TIE. SINGLE TAIL (WHIP): any whip with a single lash, such as stock whips, bullwhips, signal whips, snake whips, buggy whips, lunge whips, Legree whips and punishment whips. Single-tail whips can inflict serious injuries and can be dangerous in the hands of an inexperienced user. It requires skill and experience to use them properly. Single-tail whips are not always predictable, and mistakes can happen even with the most experienced handlers, which is why the use of a single-tail is considered edgeplay. See WHIP. 
SISSY: a male submissive who has engaged in or wishes to engage in feminization. A feminine boy submissive. The term is also used to describe a transgender person, transsexual or transvestite. Once considered a derogatory term, sissy is now being embraced by many in the BDSM community. See FEMINIZATION. SISSIFICATION: see FEMINIZATION. SISTER or SISTER WIFE or SISTER SLAVE or SUB-SISTER: a female submissive to another female submissive in the confines of a BDSM family or house. A female comrade or female fellow submissive. See related FAMILY or GROUP MARRIAGE. SJAMBOK: a specific type of heavy leather whip. It is the official punishment whip of South Africa, sometimes seen as synonymous with the Apartheid. It was traditionally made of hippopotamus or rhinoceros hide, but today it can commonly be found made of plastic or thick, dense cowhide or rubber. 
SLAPPER or DOUBLE SLAPPER: a leather strap used for striking, consisting of two pieces of leather bound together only at the base near the handle, in such a way that when a person is struck, both pieces slap together to create a loud slapping sound. The delayed hit is also believed to make the strike more painful than that of a single piece of leather. The original purpose of a slapper was for use in controlling livestock, delivering a powerful strike while creating a loud sound to scare the animal. 
SLAVE: a system in which people are treated as property. In BDSM the term is referred to as a consensual slave, a willing submissive who gives her/himself completely as property to a dominant, in a master/slave play exchange or relationship. SLAVE AUCTION: an event held at play parties in which submissives are auctioned off to the highest bidder for a set period of time. Slave auctions are often held to raise money for BDSM groups or charities. Sometimes slave auctions take place as a means for polyamorous couples or families to gain a new lover. a id="ES_SLAVE_COLLAR"> SLAVE COLLAR: see COLLAR. SLAVE CONTRACT: see CONTRACT. SLAVE PLAY: those who play as either a slave or as a slave owner. Sometimes referred to as fantasy role-play, in which elaborate scenarios are played out whereby people are sold into slavery and then kept as slaves. SLAVE POSITIONS: a structured set of positions for a slave to hold during play, or to signify her compliance to pending play. There is no set guidebook that must be used by all for the many different slave positions, and they vary from person to person. Such positions are usually set forth by the dominant or head of a particular house, for the submissive and determined during collar training. Play involving the structured task of a submissive presenting themselves to the dominant by holding many predetermined positions is most common in Gorean D/s. In fact, many of the slave positions that are used today have been adapted from the Gorean D/s structure. See GOREAN D/s also see SLAVE PRESENTATION. 
SLAVE PRESENTATION: the way in which a submissive presents her/himself to a dominant, as part of a protocol ritual, usually by kneeling before the dominant and giving a gesture or stating a predetermined phrase, often used as a declaration of the start to a play session. In some 24/7 master/slave relationships, a dominant may allow the submissive to take off a collar to shower, go to work or attend a family event. The dominant may then insist that a submissive presents her/himself to the dominant in a predetermined way, each time the submissive puts the collar back on. When the submissive presents themselves to the dominant, it signifies either that the play may resume, and/or that their devotion to the power exchange has been and is still in effect. See related SLAVE POSITIONS, PROTOCOL, and RITUALS. 
SLEEPSACK: a device for complete encasement bondage, or mummification bondage, in which a person’s entire body is immobilized. These type of devices are sometimes used for longer periods of time. Many people use the term sleepsack synonymously with the term body bag, describing any bag-type bondage device that immobilizes a person completely. Whereas other people reserve the term sleepsack to mean a bag-type bondage device that covers and binds the entire body, but not the head, much like an infant child’s sleep sack. Headless sleepsacks leave a person’s head exposed. See related BODY BAG. 
SLEEPING INSIDE or SWADDLING: the sexual act of falling asleep after intercourse while keeping the penis still inside a partner's vagina, ass, or mouth. This is best achieved with couples sleeping in the fetal position. It is recommended that a lot of lubricant is used to prevent the orifice from drying during sleep, potentially tearing the skin. Some engage in this practice to achieve a welcomed form of sleep-sex. See SEXSOMNIA. SLING: see SEX SLING. SLOW WORD: a code word to signal to a dominant during a BDSM activity that play should slow down or decrease. The slow word is the signal before the safeword. Slow words are thought by some to be topping from the bottom. See related GOWORD and TOPPING FROM THE BOTTOM. SMALL PENIS HUMILIATION or SPH: the practice of humiliating a male submissive due to the size of his penis, usually labeling him inadequate. 
SMART ASS MASOCHIST or SAM: see BRAT. SMELLING SALTS: a pungent substance sniffed as a restorative in cases of faintness or headache, consisting of ammonium carbonate mixed with perfume. When a submissive holds her/his breath for too long while receiving pain play, it is always a possibility that the submissive could faint. Having smelling salts around can be a way to revive a person quickly. 
SMOTHERBOX: a box designed to be locked over the head of a submissive and used for queening. The smotherbox has a large opening that allows a dominant to straddle the box and smother the submissive's face with genitalia. 
SNAKE WHIP: a type of flexible single-tail whip with no firm handle. It has a lash or fall similar to a bullwhip that leads to a cracker. 
SNOWBALLING: the sexual practice in which a person performs oral sex on a man, and then places his semen into another person's mouth, usually by way of a French kiss. This practice is sometimes used by a female dominant to humiliate her male cuckold submissive. 
SODOMY: sexual intercourse involving penetration of the anus. The term sodomy was derived from the Sodom and Gomorrah story from the book of Genesis in the Bible. It is considered a serious sin in many religions. Throughout history, many governments have had sodomy laws which criminalize such sexual practices. Sodomy laws are still in place in many states in the U.S. and anal sexual intercourse is still considered deviant sexual behavior by many societies. 
SOFT DOMINANCE: describes the method used to exercise dominance, choosing a softer, gentler approach. A soft dominant usually has a more playful manner, while being nurturing and empathetic, with the objective of making emotional connections with his/her submissives. Soft dominance can also refer to a dominant that never shows any strong signs of asserting dominance, and instead dominates through light persuasion and inspiration. Sadism play is not usually associated with the term soft dominance. The antonym of hard dominance. See HARD DOMINANCE. SOFT LIMIT: a limit that can be cautiously crossed with expressed permission directly before the action. A soft limit is often simply called a limit. Soft limits or limits are different from hard limits. See related LIMIT and related contrast HARD LIMIT. SOMNOPHILIA PLAY: the act of having sexual intercourse with someone sleeping or pretending to be sleeping. When such arousal causes a person distress or there is potential harm to another, it is considered a paraphilia. In this case specifically, Somnophilia. See PARAPHILIA. SOUND: see URETHRAL SOUND. SPACE WHIP: see FIBER OPTIC FLOGGER. SPANK: to strike a person, usually on the buttocks, with an open hand or with a spanking paddle. 
SPANKING BENCH: a low piece of furniture, which a person is bent over and restrained for spanking or flagellation. 
SPANKING PADDLE: see PADDLE. SPANKING SKIRT: a skirt, often made of leather or latex, in which the buttocks of a person is exposed for flagellation or a spanking. 
SPECULUM: a medical instrument used to dilate the vagina or anus to allow inspection. Often used in medical play or humiliation play. 
SPEED SKATING: a sexual act between three people in which a male person has sexual intercourse with two people that are bent over side by side one another. The male enters one partner briefly, then pulls out and quickly enters the other, repeating the process. 
SPENCER PADDLE: a specific type of paddle with a number of holes drilled in the oblong striking surface. The holes are designed to allow air to travel through, preventing any sort of air buildup between the paddle and the person being paddled. It makes for a heavier contact. These types of paddles were used in U.S. schools until recently. An American schoolteacher in the 1930s by the name of Harold Spencer is allegedly the inventor of this type of paddle. Though the implement might have been made popular by an American schoolteacher, illustrations from the early 1800's depict slaves being beaten by a similarly shaped paddle with holes. 
SPIDER GAG: a specific type of ring gag, in which metal extensions are fitted from the ring strapped in the mouth to keep the mouth and lips open. 
SPIRITUAL BDSM: a belief that BDSM expression can bring about mental healing and well-being. A blanket term for all forms of BDSM religious play. Many people that believe or practice spiritual BDSM, tend to separate spirituality from organized theistic religions, adapting more of a New Age approach towards BDSM, sometimes mixing fundamental Christian ideas with Western esoteric traditions, borrowing elements from Indian and Asian religions. The term spiritual BDSM also pertains to a form of meditation a person does before or during an intense often painful BDSM session to bring about altered states of consciousness and a psychological state of transcendent feelings. See related RELIGIOUS PLAY, FLYING and SUBSPACE. SPIT ROASTING: a three-way sex act in which a person performs oral sex on a male while being penetrated vaginally or anally by another male. 
SPLOSHING: a sexual practice/fetish in which a person covers him/herself or another person with foods of different textures and temperatures. The practice focuses on covering a person's exposed genitalia with the food, sometimes then eating the food while performing oral sex. 
SPREAD EAGLE: a position whereby a person is bound in such a way as to have her/his legs spread apart, while the arms are stretched over the head. 
SPREADER BAR: an implement consisting of a rigid rod or dowel, designed to attach to a person's ankles (ankle cuffs), keeping the person's legs spread apart. Some spreader bars have adjustable lengths. 
SPREADER CUFFS: a spreader bar with attached leg cuffs. 
SQUICK: an unexpected feeling of sudden repulsion to a BDSM act or sexual act. SSC: see SAFE, SANE, & CONSENSUAL. ST. ANDREW'S CROSS: a popular type of bondage furniture consisting of an X-shaped cross that is affixed to a frame or to a wall, in which a person can be bound for the purposes of flagellation. The four tie points for the wrist and ankles, bind a person in a spread-eagle position: the perfect position for many types of flogging. Some versions also have tie points in the middle for the waist as well. In ancient history, the St. Andrew's cross was originally called a saltire. It became known as St. Andrew's cross after a popular story that dates back to the Middle Ages, of Andrew the Apostle, (Saint Andrew) who when sentenced to death, supposedly requested his executioners to crucify him on a saltire (X-shaped cross), as he was not worthy to be crucified on the same cross style as Jesus. In BDSM circles, the St. Andrew's cross is also known as an X-frame in the United States, and in Europe it sometimes called a diagonal cross or X-cross. 
STAG: a male who gains sexual gratification by allowing or encouraging his female partner to engage in sexual relationships with other males without the attachment of any sort of humiliation or degradation. A dominant male who supports his female partner in having sex with other dominant males. Originally a swinger term for the male half of a couple who swing or engage in sexual acts with others. The term stag is also sometimes used to describe any male in a sexual act involving multiple males and one female, also known as a gang bang. Unlike a cuckold, a stag is a male who feels no shame or humiliation when his female partner has sex with other males. See relating contrast CUCKOLDRY. STAG PARTY: code word for a gangbang. Outside of the swinger or BDSM world, a stag party is simply an all-male party and often refers to the all-male bachelor party before a wedding. Being that the term gang bang has become a common vernacular, the code term stag party is now seldom used. See relating GANG BANG. STEEL BONDAGE: any form of bondage involving the use of metal restraints. STING or STINGY: referring to the sensation of sharp quick pain from a strike; the comparison of pain to that of a scratching feeling. The feelings caused by being struck by a whip or flogger are usually described as either a thud or a sting. See relating contrast THUD. STOCKS: a piece of furniture used for bondage, similar to the pillory, consisting of a two heavy planks, usually made of wood, which can close around a person's ankles, typically while they sit. It was used throughout history in the Middle Ages for public corporal punishment, torture, and humiliation. Today, in BDSM, retailers use the terms stock and pillory interchangeably. See PILLORY. STOCK PROD: see CATTLE PROD. STOCK WHIP: a single-tail whip in which a long stiff handle is separate from the lash connected with a keeper knot. A stock whip usually has a fall that connects to a cracker. 
STOCKHOLM SYNDROME: a psychological phenomenon in which hostages or persons suffering abuse feel and sometimes express sympathy for their captors or abusers, having positive feelings for them. These irrational feelings are generated by the victim mistaking a lack of abuse from their captors as an act of kindness. A form of traumatic bonding. A form of battered-person syndrome in which a capture-bonding psychological mechanism manifests as a form of bonding by hazing. It is believed by some philosophers that at the inherent root of basic human sexuality, a degree of this type bonding takes place during mating. While other people believe that all BDSM is abuse and that there is the occurrence of Stockholm syndrome or battered-person syndrome. In a sense, a certain level of capture-bonding, similar to these psychological syndromes, may indeed be in effect, however, it is intended as a welcomed healthy instrument consensually. In the BDSM realm, all mock abuse play as well as all 24/7 power exchange relationships, are intended to favor these basic desires of sexual bonding, with respect of mutual consent by all parties involved. Actual Stockholm syndrome and battered-person syndrome are real problems involving real abuse and should not be confused with BDSM play. The term Stockholm syndrome should be reserved to only describe real abuse. STRAITJACKET: a strong garment, usually made of thick canvas, with longer-than-arm length sleeves, that can be tied together behind the back to confine the arms of a person. Originally used to restrain violent mental patients. 
STRAP: an implement used for striking, consisting of a long, flat piece of heavy leather or other flexible material. The word strap also refers to any flexible material used for securing, usually with an attached buckle. 
STRAP-IN: a dildo designed to be inserted in a person either vaginally or anally and then held in place by a harness. STRAP-ON: a dildo attached to a harness, designed to be worn around the waist for the purpose of penetrating another person. 
STRAPPADO BONDAGE: a specific type of bondage in which a person is bound with hands behind her/his back, then a rope is pulled tightly upward to an overhead fixture or pulley system, causing the person's arms to lift upward, and forcing the person to bend over. This is a physically demanding form of bondage and could be dangerous if done by inexperienced people. 
STUN GUN: a self-defense weapon that administers a stream of high voltage electricity, meant to temporarily disrupt muscle functions, and inflict pain without causing significant injury. However, like any electricity play, playing with stun guns can prove to be dangerous, particularly so with a stun gun because of the high voltage that the gun emits. The average stun gun releases 1,200 volts, some devices releasing even more. Though unlikely, it is possible to stop a person's heart or disrupt body functions and cause permanent injury or death. It is advisable to never use a stun gun, a cattle prod, taser, or any other device that admits high voltage electricity for the purposes of BDSM play. Despite the obvious dangers involved with this device, some choose to ignore the dangers and engage in BDSM play using it. Hence why it is in the glossary. All dangerous BDSM activities or edgeplay have different levels of risk involved. Playing with a stun gun should be considered extremely high risk and discouraged. 
SUB DROP: see BOTTOM DROP. SUB FRENZY: the term for a process or state of mind that a submissive, usually new to BDSM, goes through, in which she/he feels as though their thirst for submissive experiences cannot be quenched. An obsessive behavior in which the submissive makes poor decisions or unwise choices, often resulting in serious harm. SUBCULTURE: see BDSM COMMUNITY. SUBMISSION: the action and/or emotional embrace of accepting or yielding to the will or authority of a dominant for the purposes of BDSM erotic play. SUBMISSIVE or SUB: a title for a person who assumes the role of submission, submitting to the dominant in a power exchange relationship. A person who surrenders physical and psychological control to a dominant for the purposes of erotic play. The opposite of a dominant. SUB-SISTER: see SISTER. SUBSKIN: see LEATHER BUTT. SUBSPACE: a term for the condition or state of mind of a submissive during a deeply involved play session. Deep subspace is often characterized as a state of deep recession and incoherence. Some have described subspace as similar to the feeling one might have directly after an intense orgasm, or as having a feeling of intoxication and extreme well-being. Thought to be caused by the release of endorphins in the brain. See ENDORPHINS. SUSPENSION or SUSPENSION BONDAGE: any form of bondage in which a person is suspended off the floor with rope or chain. Usually refers to elaborate rope work that suspends a person in the air. Suspension can also refer to body suspension with body suspension hooks. See ROPE SUSPENSION and BODY SUSPENSION. 
SUSPENSION BAR: a bar, similar to a spreader bar, used for suspension. Often, the person is bound to the bar, and the bar is then lifted into the air via a pulley system. SUSPENSION CUFFS: any restraint for the wrists or ankles, designed in such a way as to distribute the wearer's weight for suspension. 
SUSPENSION FRAME or SUSPENSION RACK: any upright frame designed for the purpose of suspension. Suspension cannot always be safely secured to a ceiling; in which case a suspension frame is ideal. 
 SUSPENSION HOOKING or SUSPENSION: see BODY SUSPENSION. SUSPENSION HOOKS: see BODY SUSPENSION HOOKS. SUTURING or SUTURE PLAY: the practice of temporarily suturing parts of the body, particularly the genitals, for sexual gratification. See related NEEDLE PLAY. 
SWAPPING: switching partners temporarily for play or sexual purposes. See SWINGERS. SWINE PLAY: a specific type of animalism in which a person takes on the role of a pig. It is considered a particularly extreme version of humiliation, as such play is often used to refer to a person's appearance as overweight or behavior as dirty. Often wearing a plastic pig nose and ears are a part of the play, as well as writing with a marker on the submissive that she/he is a pig. 
SWING or SEX SWING: see SEX SLING. SWINGERS: people engaged in a polyamorous relationship. Also, people who attend swinger parties and engage in sexual acts with partners who they are not in a committed relationship with. The term also refers to a specific action in a polyamorous relationship in which a couple switches partners with another polyamorous couple, sometimes also referred to as swapping. See SWAPPING, also see related POLYAMORY. SWITCH: one who takes on dual roles of dominant and submissive, switching between the two at different times and/or with different partners. Someone who identifies him/herself as being neither naturally dominant nor naturally submissive, and who is able to switch between the two roles naturally. Some people are able to submit to one person while dominating another. See related DOMINANT and SUBMISSIVE. SWITCH or TREE SWITCH or BRANCH SWITCH: the term switch also refers to a freshly cut flexible branch, usually from a willow or birch tree, used for striking. Historically, using a freshly cut tree branch to strike the buttocks of a person was the most common corporal punishment practiced by parents on their children, alongside caning. A cane can deliver the same experience and stinging strike as a switch and is more commonly used in BDSM. |